I would like to thank Dave Dubois and Mary Marcuccio/P4AC for their very important role in helping me to get my daughter back from the demon and despair of drug addiction. They will forever hold a very special place within my heart. When GMA contacted me and asked me to go public with our story, it was with much deliberation before deciding to participate. I looked deep within my heart and decided that because of Dave telling his very painful story, I owed it to him and Alisha to do the same. Maybe, just maybe I can help someone else. The stigma of drug addiction needs to be changed.  The fact is, drug addiction has no prejudice, it can attack anyone from any walk of life – even kids from “good homes”.

Unfortunately, because of the stigma, many parents choose to try to fight the battle behind closed doors in their own way. They do a lot of praying and hoping. The fact is, HOPE IS NOT A STRATEGY. You cannot simply “will” your child to stop doing drugs.  Most often, by the time a parent even realizes that their child is using drugs, it is already too late. They can’t just stop of their own will.

Parents need to be educated on drug addiction. First and foremost, you must understand that when your child is using drugs, they are no longer behaving like your child or capable of making rational decisions. The drugs have taken over their brain and their ability to understand right from wrong, or consequences for their actions. They will tell you things that they think you want to hear, like I can stop whenever I want, I only use sometimes, and yes, they may even blame you for their addiction to drugs. Inflicting guilt is common and our response as parents is oftentimes one of self-blame. If only I had . . .  I feel that it is important to stop blaming yourself so that you can move forward to taking steps to try to help your child.

What are the steps you may be asking? For me, I was lucky. When I saw the story of Alisha, I knew I had to do something and fast. I didn’t want to lose my daughter. When I contacted P4AC, Mary helped to educate me on drug addiction and the typical behavior of a child addicted to drugs.  I learned that it is almost impossible to control the behavior of an addict. I learned that I must STOP enabling my daughter.  I could no longer try to reason with her, or provide her with a comfortable environment to continue her drug addiction. I followed the “rules” that Mary provided me. Lauren went into rehab and came home a month later. Before she left rehab she was given an injection of Naltrexone. She came home to a new set of house rules and we viewed them as a contract. If she violated the contract, the consequences would be immediate.(Several excerpts from our contract are posted on our site.) As her brain began to slowly heal, the Naltrexone provided the safety net we needed to keep Lauren from using.

Sharing our story has not been easy, but nor has the road to recovery. At our last meeting, Dr. Shafa made an analogy that I thought was very profound. He said something to effect of, if a person was drowning and you threw them a rope and they missed it, wouldn’t you throw it again, and again until they caught it? I can only say I am so very thankful that Lauren caught it!!!!

I wish you well,

Valerie
(Lauren’s Mom)